This is my lunch (and breakfast and dinner and snack....). I am
seriously in need of detox. Yes that is right.

from alcohol, from junkfood, from life itself.

i had a dream about tour the other night and taylor introduced me to
someone as "his friend". HAHAHAAHAHAHAHA. this means i spend way too
much time around/thinking of these guys. by the way, if we were friends
I'd make him punch me in the face. everyone needs a little ass kicking
sometimes.

so my cunt of a manager (LOL) changed my schedule tomorrow from 9-4 to
10-2 because apparently im hot shit and can't take time off to get
insanely drunk in tulsa, ok. whatever new job right now please.

eight ball(er) tour '08

i don't know why we insist on nicknaming our trips/tours. i think we're fucking retarded sometimes. i'm sure a lot of you agree, too. whatever, i have fun. fuck off.

so this is what we're doing. prepare for the worst:

MINNEAPOLIS-MILWAUKEE-CLEVELAND
COLUMBUS-NASHVILLE-LOUISVILLE
CHICAGOX2
TRB*~

quote of the trip:

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I will kick you repeatedly in the balls!

the end.

random gems from the weekend*~

i've slept about ten hours and still feel like this is what my face looks like:

X_-

no lie. i am passed dead on the toliet, i'm nailed in the coffin, waiting for burial.

i also took my bra off last night to some black smudges, like eyeliner. it looks like someone tried to Y SO SRS? my chest. what the hell happened sunday night in tulsa? how inappropriate was it? i need to know.

(there is a beer in my hand, THAT JUST HAPPENED)

(at this point none of us could stand)

(lmao my face behind A, and that was the choice holder for redbulls)

SATURDAY/SUNDAY

alright i'm still dying, fyi. look no capitals, bad grammar & punctuation ahead, i swear. not to mention my right heel is DYING. i'm a mess. oklahoma fucks people up. i am fucked. after friday night being so AMAZING, i didn't know how we would live saturday. um..i think shay was still there? oh yeah, she was. we spent the day dicking around, that's for sure. shay and i woke up at got some coffee from the always amazing*~ starbucks in bixby. we had to go back to woodland hills, shay needed makeup. god for some awful reason this day was a blur. i bought some horrendous yellow dress to wear. it was cute though. we went back, i think we had some cocktails to start the night off right and headed downtown. i don't remember who we saw that night but it was all sorts of fun, even if shay & i walked around randomly. we met up with bree for a drink right down from cain's, well i wasn't drinking there, she was.

i seriously can't understand what happened this night. except crazy almost dance parties. and hot heath ledger look alikes. it was a hit mess. so blah blah blah we ended up back at the apartment and shay had to leave to drive home. i miss her terribly. i slept like 3 hours and woke up to:

liiiiindsey....can you get my shirt, it's by the door?

it seems to me that C had the bad case of GHB-sies. friday night she was fall down drunk out of nowhere, saturday she was being stripped. what the hell.

saturday we ended up seeing step brothers (ashley & i) and then the dark knight (the four of us went, second time seeing it, i think it's safe to say we'd all bang the joker....not kidding). we had the most god awful kids behind us and A went to complain to the staff. it was ridic. TWENTY TIMES we turned around to say 'shut the fuck up you brats'. i paid $2.75 but not to hear your dumb ass talk.

we ended up downtown at plan B, drinking before our 14 hour car ride home and let me tell you, it was fun in my head when we made plans to do it but when the alarm went off at 6:30 a.m. to leave, i was sobbing. i don't know what i drank, it could have been draino for all i know, and it was amazing. i had four and vaguely remembering ending up at a waffle house then demanding C takes me to the moe house. if there was tequila in my drinks, the night makes a lot of sense now. i drove most of the way home too, it was hotness in a bottle (idk i'm so tired STILL, i've had 8 hours of sleep the last four days, yay stackers).

i am so glad to be home, i missed my shower; the pressure is heavenly. i missed my dog too. even though she ignores me half the time.

ps:
my heel kills, i'm about to slice it off.

change your song before i throw your iphone into 75

lmao i love myself sometimes. few more pics, but unfort. i have no photo editing program right now, my life.

(this is where the night went wrong)

(what the hell? free redbull??? there were 5 in my purse)

(pre-drunk eyes)

(one of my fave cities)

(mmmmmtyson)

BECAUSE I HAVE ONLY ONE EYE OPEN

(bracecizzles and beer '08)

We almost died in Tulsa and I'm pretty sure it would have been the funniest shit ever. I don't have all the pictures YET but bet your damn ass I'll post some here when I do. First of all, drinking & that heat makes you get so damn silly (um Sunday night....I wasn't in the right frame of mind, let me tell you). The trip started off really shitty. First of all we couldn't pick up our rental (didn't end up getting it until 5:30, nearly). WE GOT SIDE SWIPED ON THE WAY TO GET THE CAR. Alyssa and I were like "um, we should probably not leave the state, okay?" and needed a shot right away. The cop took 45 minutes to get there and then another 30 minutes to run our info.

So we finally got on the road about 5:30/6:00 and it was all down hill from there. We got through MI/IL like a breeze, like usual, once we hit STL it was storming something fierce. I am pretty sure we needed Noah's Ark to get through. Halfway through I took two stackers and decided to let the bitches sleep (love ya guys, srsly). QUOTE OF MY LIFE:

just saying guys, i'm about to have a heart attack and if we end up upside down in a ditch, you know why.

LMAO OMG I ALMOST KILLED US. They'd wake up every hour or two and ask if I was okay. So needless to assume, Smooth Criminal was in my head all weekend. As soon as I hit Oklahoma it was 95-100 on the turnpike, we rolled into Tulsa about 8:30/9:00 and I was ready for a drink. NO SERIOUSLY. We got to Ashley's and decided there was no sleeping and went to Woodland and Jamba (MMMMMM) and then Hong Kong for a lunch buffet. By the time we got back to the apartment, which is in Bixby, so it's a good decent drive outside of downtown and our shopping excursion area, we were ready to shower, make jewelry, and drink. Note to all: do your makeup/hair before drinking because you'll probably have purple and green eyes. We all were hot bitches.

So we headed to a bar near Ashley's house for a pregame session and then headed down to the downtown area, stopping at a shadesville liquor store for more pregaming. Whoever lets me in a place like that when I'm CLEARLY intoxicated should be tased on the spot. I wanted to vomit by the time we got there already. We went and shared 2 42 oz margaritas (LMAO the night had a bad turn due to tequila, isn't that always how it happens?). It was messed up. We were soooooo stoked for Phantom (hm, wonder why). We got there and I headed straight to the bar alone I think. When I came back, it was time to give Taylor his bracelet C&A made for him. I needed a shot of tequila first. Oh, apparently when I was drunk I'd log into my h.net mail to make sure I wasn't banned, LMAO. I'm not lying. So we walk over to the fence and Taylor was like -_- (maybe he had a few beers and margaritas too, I can dream right?). "You guys aren't from around here". Why do you know where I'm from, whyyyyyyy! Not to mention I go to 10 different cities on tour so....

After that went down it was back to the bar and I came back with double-fisting action of yumminess. By this time it was a one eyed time. I'm sure while we dance we looked like we were having seizures. Would explain Taylor & Zac's horrified faces!!! WHATEVER. I worked hard for this trip, I haven't done anything since APRIL. Kiss my butt. We left after AAR and I still didn't have enough so we needed to find a new bar. C had to use the bathroom so she hit McNellies (?? maybe i don't remember) and I was outside screaming at Shay to hurry up, she drove up from Louisiana. She also took an 8.5 hour trip into 6. She is the love of my life. C was in the bathroom for sixteen years so I had to go inside. She ripped me into the bathroom and goes: GUESS WHO THE FUCK IS AT THE BAR. I was hoping she was going to say Garth Brooks or my love Orlando Bloom (HAH I WISH) but no, it was Taylor. Not like our life that night could get any worse. She called Alyssa and she rushed over like Batman or some shit. They decided to buy shots for Taylor (oh god I needed another beer, fremboise FTW!). So after 15 minutes he didn't do it, they wanted to go revoke it (I would have done it, SoCo and all). LOL, oh they were Red Headed Sluts, minus jager which is sick shit, SoCo replaced it. Reminds me of last summer when Jillian & I drank a whole punch bowl of SoCo punch together. SO DAMN GOOD. He proceeded to ask if Alyssa was a red headed slut and then did the shots. I slammed the rest of my beer and was ready to call it a night. I would need 2 hours of sleep if we were going to have anymore encounters like this and thankfully, we didn't.

I can't even get into Saturday yet until I see the pictures, I had to step it up 20 notches though, that's for sure.

Saturday/Sunday will come tonight/tomorrow (YAY DAYS OFF)

(pre-one eyed driving and voms)

WOW I AM ALIVE.

HEY IT'S SUMMER! I've been pretty dead since winter, huh? But now I think I am back to stay. I love it over here. Don't really care if anyone reads this, I like rambling, there is nothing wrong with that.

Tour dates...just came out. In case you're wondering, I'm doing seven (plus TRB in January makes eight in my mind). The tour motto is STILL "balls to the wall". Our tour name, well, is a bit funnier. Eight Ball(er) Tour. I swear, we're so funny sometimes I can't even stand it. I want to make a t-shirt, like a baseball jersey type deal, with SHARK and the number eight on the back. It'd be funny.

LOOK OUT TULSA. Christal, Alyssa, and I are coming down for Dfest. Bring on the tequila, vodka, and sunshine because I plan on being a hot wreck all three days I'm in the city. Just throwing that out there. It will be like the Ingram fiasco part two.

Random picture time....
That's from the Royal Oak show in April. Oh, yes, a tour happened in April. I almost forget until I see my picture on facebook. It feels like forever since I've seen 'the boys'.

xoxoxo

lindsey